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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car? Carlos.

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There are three types of people, those who can count and those who can't.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, but not like the other passengers in the car with him.

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Wife: "Honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi Pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No you’re not."

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There is a new trend in our office; everyone is putting names on their food. I saw it today, while I was eating a sandwich named Kevin.

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Why do Jews have big noses?
Because the air is free.

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I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but it doesn't matter, none of them work.

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Jesus was a typical man. They always say they'll come back, but you never see them again.

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How do you stop a Mexican tank? Shoot the guy pushing it.

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What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father in law.

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